Monday, October 31, 2011

It's not that I'm lazy


I'm not lazy.

It wasn't more than two weeks ago that I schlepped the kids to the pumpkin patch and lifted, transferred, returned, lifted others, returned those and basically carted around about 200 pounds of pumpkins for about an hour while they decided which pumpkins they would take home for the Great Jack-o-Lantern Carving of 2011.

I was just tired.

Well tired and none to eager to relive the not-so-Great Jack-o-Lantern Carving event of 2010.

Which produced hives.

It was really practicality that caused me to impulse buy four sets of reusable plastic face parts at the dollar store on the night before Halloween.

That and we'd not yet carved the pumpkins.

But Ittybit would have none of it.

Didn't matter that her red, itchy rash lasted three days. She was prepared to wear rubber kitchen gloves up to her elbows and carve the pumpkins with a Sharpie if it came to that.

My husband didn't say anything about my plastic shopping bag full of toxic waste. But I could read his mind.

I wasn't being lazy.

I just wasn't going to carve the pumpkins.

Even thinking about it made my skin itch.

So the three of them hunkered down in front of the fire and started to work their magic. Square eyes, jagged teeth, a nose that looked like a question mark melting in fear of the answer.

s-scary stuff

Four pumpkins in ... halfway through the pile ... bedtime beckoned.

"We'll have to finish these tomorrow," said dad.

"If we have time after school, you mean," scoffed Ittybit.

"And hell freezes over," I added.

Only The Champed laughed.

He knew about the bag.


It's not that he's lazy.

He just takes after me.

pumpkins 2011

Happy Halloweening to you!


I just wanted to thank my neighbors in advance.

Trick-or-treating is better in my neighborhood than yours ... #justsayin

Because my neighborhood rocks this holiday.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Thursday, October 27, 2011

How do I love thee?

Batboy, mittens and backpack

Let me count the accessories.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Projects like this make me wish school was year-round

... and that we started this assignment in June.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

She's decided ...


Her costume, that is.

Little Miss Early Bershon has decided she's had it with all the princess stuff.

She's going to be a "Butterfly Girl" this year.

Woe to the person who confuses the two on their doorstep. They might wish they'd left their lights off ...

We began this year's project by making a paper template.

Paper template for butterflies

Folded lots of construction paper.

Paper butterfly

And cut out dozens of paper butterflies, which she decorated with marker and sequined scales.

Butterfy Garden

I took all the dried butterflies and basted them to a green pinafore dress she's almost outgrown.

paper butterflies

And here it is: Chica Mariposa!

She's finally decided on a costume

We are also working on hot-gluing some of these paper creatures to a headband so they will flutter around her head as she walks around the neighborhood.

Chica Mariposa

We also made a ring out of ribbon and crepe.

I have long eschewed the value of hot glue. Costumes without it would be impossible.

Next it's his turn.

He wants to be (and I kid you not) a superhero skeleton man. ...

"Like when Metroman faked his own death."

Monday, October 24, 2011

Chef Boyr'he

He's mastered the egg cracking.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

I gare-un-tee


Homegrown, would you believe it?

Good days are made of sweet bananas and Cajun spice.

Friday, October 21, 2011

A craftacularly bad dream come true

Swap House

So I happened on a fixer-upper of a dollhouse at a swap meet recently.

I didn't think twice before picking it up and hauling it two blocks back to our car (along with the volume of stuffed animals the kids had appropriated).

I had visions of haunted dollhouse in my head.

But ... I am not crafty, no matter what you may think. I'm rarely able to make anything the way I see it in my head ... or even in pictures by people whose ideas I wish to purloin.

But as is usual in delusions like mine, the idea that I might actually be able to make something of this took the shape of a discolored set of curtains, tacks already piercing the fabric, stuffed inside the attic crevice. Horror included.

Taking it home, and setting up near my computer ... where I could stare at it and think. And mull. And Google expensive dollhouse furnishings. And wonder what I was getting myself into.

Finally, I decided on a first step.

I'd make a mattress for the bed I didn't yet have.

I made plans:

Doll House Mattress

And got to work.

After 15 minutes or so I managed to sew this:

haunted dollhouse mattress

It went so well, I'm wondering if I could turn the "Princess and the Pea" fairytale a nightmare?

Thursday, October 20, 2011


cats cradle

Or an ode to Harry Chapin.

Not sure.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

He may win in foosball ...

Foose the ball

But he won't let it go to his head.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Interpretive dance

It's all in the eye of the beholder.

Dance studio ... Emerson Umbrella

Unless it's in their ears.

Interpretive dance

Monday, October 17, 2011

It's 'Take Your Monkeybaby to Work' day

Batboy Wears Monkeybaby to Work day

He's not putting up with any monkey business though.

Friday, October 14, 2011


The Champ is sharing our fascination for our new favorite drink, the Dark & Stormy.

The virgin version is apple cider and a wedge of Key lime served in a measuring shot glass.

He's all about moderation.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Reason number 2,200,023 ...

Why riding your bike to the bus stop may be a risky undertaking.

one reason you maybe shouldn't ride your bike to the bus stop ...

Papa Wheelie has way too much fun bringing it back to the house.

papa wheelie brings it back to the house

Hopefully, your friends were looking off in the other direction.

reason number 2,000,023

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

They go up ... And they go down

They go up ... They go down ...

A month ago we welcomed Lulu the wonder dog to our old, falling-apart home, with the hopes that her person, Dappa John, could remedy some of its ills.

Four weeks, fully three of them rainy, and somehow he managed to pull off a string of miracles.

Insulated foundation, revised landscaping and a side porch that makes the rest of the house look shabby.

Not to mention felling a few trees, getting in some firewood and even measuring for windows ... when we get around to that.

A thank-you doesn't seem enough.

But here it is: A start -- Thanks, Dappa John.

And thanks, Lulu ...

We'd almost forgotten how nice it was to have a pre-lick cycle for the dishwasher.

Friday, October 07, 2011

The soundtrack of our lives


What were you singing about?

"I don't know."

Thursday, October 06, 2011

Maybe we shouldn't tempt fate

First we had fleas, then floods, then beetles and now FLIES! ... Seriously? If this god's wrath I just as soon have darkness over the land for three days. I could use the sleep.

FIRST we had fleas.

THEN floods.

and NOW we have FLIES?!!!

If this is god's wrath I'd just as soon he skip to the bit about Three Days of Darkness Over The Land and leave it at that.

I could use the sleep.

Of course, having said that, the next infestation will probably be frogs.

Maybe it would be a good thing: They'd eat the flies.

Wednesday, October 05, 2011

He's leaving!

I think our new side porch tells time by the sun

Jed's dad is heading back to Louisiana after enduring four weeks of indentured servitude and countless snide remarks about ziggurats and other Mesopotamian building techniques.

To celebrate his grace and generosity we'd like to invite friends and neighbors to a little going away party in his honor this Friday, October 7, at quitting time and not a moment sooner.

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

He's so Sharpie

Tattoo you

I'm not that Sharpie.

(At least he kept it off the furniture.)

Monday, October 03, 2011