What I learned today ...

You learn all kinds of things when visiting a kindergarten class.

For instance:

When practicing writing the alphabet, did you know that the line to which the tail of a lowercase g descends is called "The Worm Line"?

I sure didn't.

Now, I might have guessed that a d's belly is exactly the same as a b's belly, only it's facing backward ... but I had to think about it some.

And I sort of had a clue that my bellybutton is NOT screwed in with hardware of any kind, yet I kept silent.

It's true. 

I could have guessed that most of the students milling about the room were older (stronger ... and smarter) than they were the last time I saw them ...

But it's reassuring to have a definitive declaration to that effect.

However, I was dumbfounded when I discovered these in a bin against the chalkboard:

Honestly? I have no idea what they're for but I suspect that when the zombie minions break through the worm line and take over, these kids will be ready.

You, too, can be the life of the parody

Oh ... I love JibJab. 

So much fun sticking the heads of people I adore on other people's bodies.

Watch them dance around.

Like fools.

Who wouldn't love that?

I bet even Kim Jong Un gets a chuckle from this Gangnum Style craze.

Mitt Romney's probably not terribly amused, but ... 

Oh ... Who cares? Certainly not any among the 47 percent.

But Ittybit and The Champ are eating up K-Pop star Psy's cowboy dance moves.

Which, I have to admit, are helping fuel Ittybit's desire for a Dance Party Birthday next month.

Thanks to Jib Jab, she too can join the Parody.

Although, I'm wondering how it will look when the kids are all dancing to a soundtrack of Selena Gomez and One Direction.

Eat the Bird

Is it strange to wake up the day after Thanksgiving and realize you and nine or 10 of your friends and relatives sat across a table from one another to share a meal yet never once shared in conversation the things for which we are thankful?

Is it horrible that we never took the time to reflect on what it was that got us to this place?

History?

Happenstance?

Luck?

Good or bad?

Perhaps.

For a moment I felt a twinge of guilt ... as if the failure to verbally examine gratitude made me as ungrateful as if I'd spent the last Thursday in November greedily shopping for things I didn't need.

It didn't last long. I know what I am grateful for and for whom; and trying to put those thoughts into words doesn't give them any more weight.

I am grateful for everyone who has ever made me laugh ...

or smile  ...

or feel important.

And yet, perhaps more surprisingly, I'm just as grateful for everyone who has ever made me irritated or anxious or feel at loose ends. For all the things that have frightened me. Saddened me. Made me think about the world and all the parts of it I can't control.

As I sit there, looking over at my parents, it feels wrong to be thankful for things that just plain hurt.

Thankful for acceptance.

It just makes a speech about gratitude seem as awkward as the silence. 

Stranger than strangers

Did I mention that a certain person, who, for the first quarter of his kindergarten career has only worn a certain green shirt (we have four) and a certain style of jersey shorts (even as temperatures dipped into the low 20s), has finally been convinced to wear his "skinny jeans" to school?

!!!!!

Honestly, I feel like I don't know this new kid who gets off the bus at our house.

Although, when he gets in the house and strips off his jeans ... and his pajama bottoms ...  and his shorts ...  right down to his underoos, it all comes back to me.

Rice and relaxation

The little miss has been missing school, the result of some niggling, nefarious virus that's just enough to keep her temperature elevated and give her ear the occasional boxing, but not enough to keep her from eating, sleeping or being characteristically chatty.

It didn't affect her creativity either.

Her touch of ear ache -- and my impromptu fix: A pillow stuffed with basmati rice that can be heated in microwave and applied to affected area -- has given us an idea for teacher gifts this holiday season.

44 for 4 more

I *almost* feel bad for our Alex P. Keaton Silas.

His horse didn't win.

He had heard that Romney would cut education, and, under that impression, was excited for a Romney victory and a shorter school day.

We chatted though -- I told him about how people make all kinds of promises during elections they can't always keep. And sometimes they make promises that if they were to keep -- such as cutting spending on education and social programs -- might hurt the entire country in the years to come.

He's ok now.  And he saw enough of President Obama's acceptance speech to change his mind.

Although he's hoping he can have the dog Malia and Sasha won't be getting.

Poor deluded kid.

I wish you all could join us for some trick-or-treating ...

 

















It's the best unholy day of obligation of them all.