Friday, March 02, 2007

Dear big box hardware store with the orange logo ...



You know who you are. You rhyme with "Loam Cheapo."

We've got this kid, and she's three. And she's really cute if I do say so myself. Some of your employees say so, too, when she visits your enormous store with her dad and they shop for tools and building supplies.

I know that YOU are not a parent, and you are not responsible for any behavior-related rewards a parent of such a child -- who was being EXCEEDINGLY charming just sitting in the shopping cart, singing to herself and talking with other shoppers, as her dad filled it up with all kinds of widgets and gizmos that a kid her age isn't allowed to touch. You know, in order to prevent electric shock. In other words: NOT TOYS -- might wish to bestow.

And those balloons ... with the festive spring colors you had littered about the store sure looked good to a kid like that. In fact, the dad asked one of your orange-vested mules if it would be alright to take one of the resplendent orbs.

"NO."

"Well, can I buy one."

"They're not for sale. NO."


Jaysus.

When someone spends $600 in electrical supplies at your cavernous warehouse, it seems a gratis balloon would be nothing short of beneficient customer service.

So for the cost of a balloon and two teary eyes, we'd like you to know that we'll be spending our big-box home improvement money at Lowes. It will be worth the trip.

6 comments:

Xdm said...

My friend's father is italian. Thick, thick accent. "Giuliana! I gotta ta go to da store-ah! Dah tool-ah store-ah! Dah Homo Deep!"

It makes melaugh every.single time.

Firestarter5 said...

I would've just taken one and given it to Annabel, to hell with what the staff say. Home Depot could kiss my white ass if they couldn't spare one balloon for IttyBit.

I don't go to Home Depot as it is, and this act of ignorance only solidifies my position even more.

What a bunch of asshats.

Her Bad Mother said...

Tards. Total tards.

That is something that would prompt a letter from me, to management, and not just on my blog.

Tards.

Julie said...

Lowe's has those awesome blue car/shopping carts. Well worth the visit.

Chris said...

One time, at Home Depot, a lady came running out from behind the counter to give the Boss a balloon. She made a point to chase us down. Guess it's still all about the people.

toyfoto said...

Oh, I'm sure it's not a corporate-wide edict instructing employees not to part with balloons, but I'm just so fed up with all of the big chains that when these little things happen it's all we need to make sure we are shopping locally first.