Monday, October 31, 2011
It's not that I'm lazy
I'm not lazy.
It wasn't more than two weeks ago that I schlepped the kids to the pumpkin patch and lifted, transferred, returned, lifted others, returned those and basically carted around about 200 pounds of pumpkins for about an hour while they decided which pumpkins they would take home for the Great Jack-o-Lantern Carving of 2011.
I was just tired.
Well tired and none to eager to relive the not-so-Great Jack-o-Lantern Carving event of 2010.
Which produced hives.
It was really practicality that caused me to impulse buy four sets of reusable plastic face parts at the dollar store on the night before Halloween.
That and we'd not yet carved the pumpkins.
But Ittybit would have none of it.
Didn't matter that her red, itchy rash lasted three days. She was prepared to wear rubber kitchen gloves up to her elbows and carve the pumpkins with a Sharpie if it came to that.
My husband didn't say anything about my plastic shopping bag full of toxic waste. But I could read his mind.
I wasn't being lazy.
I just wasn't going to carve the pumpkins.
Even thinking about it made my skin itch.
So the three of them hunkered down in front of the fire and started to work their magic. Square eyes, jagged teeth, a nose that looked like a question mark melting in fear of the answer.
Four pumpkins in ... halfway through the pile ... bedtime beckoned.
"We'll have to finish these tomorrow," said dad.
"If we have time after school, you mean," scoffed Ittybit.
"And hell freezes over," I added.
Only The Champed laughed.
He knew about the bag.
It's not that he's lazy.
He just takes after me.
Happy Halloweening to you!
I just wanted to thank my neighbors in advance.
Because my neighborhood rocks this holiday.