Sunday, June 17, 2007

Daddy's girl

Just two days after father's day, Jed will have himself a son.

No small thing for a man who bristles at having been surrounded by women for more than 30 years. He still rants about being raised by a pack of shewolves (his mother's many friends) whom he insists damaged his tender male psyche with their 1970s off-the-cuff male-bashing ways.

"Oh, they'd deny it," he says, "but I'd have to listen to them talk about how men really were horrible. And there I was, devastated, because I knew that someday I was going to be a man."

Since then he's continued to be surrounded by estrogen: A wife, a daughter, even two female dogs.

When I asked him to guess what Thing 2 would be he never even hesitated. "A girl," he said without question.

Nope.

I have to admit, that for an instant I worried about the potential for favoritism. The "MY BOY BILL," chest beating-type of sentiment that made me want off the Carousel.

I also worried about MY abilities of bringing up a boy. What, afterall, do I really know about boys outside of some early tomboy tendencies?

So when our local public radio station aired an interview with Dr. Margaret Meeker, author of "Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters," I turned up the volume.

I don't know what I was thinking, really. If I were to be honest, I'd have to say that I thought perhaps I could catch something that he was doing that would forever alienate her and send her skipping down the path of depression at break-neck speed.

But as I listened, I realized how lucky she is to have him as her dad. How, even in these tiny years, he's engaged without being overbearing. And how he exhibits with every action that she is a part of him, too.

And there was even a lesson in there for me. "Don't go thinking you know everything there is to know about girls."

Happy Father's Day, Jeddie. I don't think you even need to read this book.

4 comments:

Sarah said...

I hope he has a very happy Father's Day!

My dad had all girls. We lived two houses down from his two childhood best friends in both directions (we were sandwiched between them) and both of them had all girls. All three of them had female dogs, female cats, strong mother figures, and sisters.

They used to have Escape Parties, as in THERE IS WAY TOO MUCH ESTROGEN AND WE ARE FLIPPING THE HELL OUT!

Then, recently, my dad was talking about how his friend had a surprise baby - a little boy. His other kids are out of college but now he has this son to raise. I think my dad thought his friend would favor the boy, too, because he has more money now and he's older now, because he's only had girls before and been surrounded by girls, etc.

But I think that our neighbor has really proved us all wrong and shown that fathers love all their kids the same, regardless of gender.

I can't wait to hear about the new baby!!

Anonymous said...

I had the same thoughts about raising a boy. (I have 2 now.) I read "Why Gender Matters" and "Raising Cain" while I was nursing my first son. They were both really good and very interesting. You are going to have a blast! Good luck! I can't wait to see and hear about your new baby. Even with a 7-month old, I look at little newborns and think that I can't remember ever having a baby that small. Time goes so fast!

Binky said...

As usual, it's the perfect photo illustration. Happy (belated) Father's Day to Jed.

I can't believe you are going to have a baby tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!

Heather said...

Happy belated father's day!! Good luck tomorrow, I'll be thinking of you!!