Saturday, May 03, 2008

The Second Act



Some virtual friends of mine are having seconds.

They've bellied up to the bar of motherhood once, drank down the sweet (and sometimes sour) nectar of the gods, and asked the barkeep for another shot.

Didn't matter that the first one may have given them swollen ankles, horrible heartburn, morning sickness or any number of uncomfortable ailments forty pounds of water, blood and baby (not to mention an entire new organ we women grow to sustain this new life) can cause. Still they came back asking for more.

I remember what this time felt like: the weeks and days before we were to meet Thing 2. It was just 10 months ago. I had wanted him SO much, and yet there I was worried about the change it would mean to our family.

*Could I love him as much as I loved his sister?
*Was I short changing her?
*Was I short changing him?
*How was I going to juggle another being when I felt I was dropping so many balls with the one already here?

Those questions were never answered in a way I can explain. I suppose I have no advice.

We women are all so different. Our children are, too. I don't know the people you are bringing into this world. But I do know that you can trust yourselves to know these new people when they arrive. Easy or challenging, you will figure it out together.

A very wise woman once told me that the first child comes into your life and turns it upside down. Turns it into a circus. The second child seems to sneak in quietly during an intermission. And when the show starts again you almost forget this new being wasn't there -- a part of the family -- right from the beginning.

8 comments:

Whirlwind said...

That is true.

I can remember life pre-child, but it's hard not to remember having just one or two. It gets hazy.

Mrs. Chicken said...

I can't imagine what I did with my life before we had our daughter. As nervous as I get, I never doubt that our son will be loved.

Thank you for this, friend.

kaela said...

Aww.. love the photo and the circus analogy. I'm glad to see you all doing so well!

Binky said...

That is an apt analogy. Though it kind of makes me sad for the first act and all the forgetting. But everything makes me sad right now. I just had a baby two weeks ago, what do you want from me?!? ;)

toyfoto said...

Binky, you are beautiful.

Anonymous said...

Dear stranger,
Grate picture
Bless you all.
I am hoping and praying for the second child...Just wishing and hoping and sometimes fear that what if it won't happen?
So still no anxiety and worry for how we will manage...
Only worry that what if "thing 2" won't come....
Love your posts...

Her Bad Mother said...

"A very wise woman once told me that the first child comes into your life and turns it upside down. Turns it into a circus. The second child seems to sneak in quietly during an intermission. And when the show starts again you almost forget this new being wasn't there -- a part of the family -- right from the beginning."

That? Is perfect. Beautiful. Thank you.

tracey said...

indeed it was my first that turned my life upside down BUT it was my second that turned it into a circus-no doubt.
: )
i LOVE that photo! good lord woman!