Monday, May 05, 2008

I wouldn't stand too close to me today


I'm feeling randomy. And not in a good way.

I've been pretay angray latelay.

Like the kind of angry one feels when they feel attacked. Or misunderstood. Or slighted. Or maligned. Even if no one else really thinks those things have happened to you at all. It's the kind of angry that turns into sadness.

I hate not being able to talk about it.

... But I'm not gonna talk about it.

I'm also pretty ticked at Hillary Clinton. Her insistance that a lifting of a gas tax will do anything to help the American people (regardless of who pays for it) is nothing more than pandering in my estimation. And really? I'm over it. We need to pay the piper and get used to big price tags at the pump. We need to use less energy all around and not just make our rampant consumption affordable.

... But I'm not going to bother you with that noise.

Speaking of Hillary. I'm seething a little over this and I really don't know why.

A lot about the piece bothers me, but for some reason what stands out most is this passage:

Old-guard feminists, for their part, seem not yet aware—or prepared to believe—that the younger generation is coming around. “Young women take a lot of things for granted,” Geraldine Ferraro told me. “We sometimes joke, ‘If you don’t get it, give it all back.’ We don’t want to say, ‘Look how bad it was.’ But they don’t know their workplaces are better because of loudmouths like me who said, ‘This is not how society should be run.’ ” Linda Hirshman, author of Get to Work: A Manifesto for Women of the World, said she thinks the feminist movement, even the third wave, may have seen its final days. For another movement to reach critical mass, she said, women in society may need to experience what she calls “an accretion of insult.” But with the inequities highlighted by Hillary Clinton’s presidential bid reminding us of the inequities we experience on a regular basis, the insults may have, well … accreted.

I huge part of me wants Hirshman, and Ferraro for that matter, to take a big giant leap off a steep, rocky cliff. I know it's been two years since I wrote this but I still feel pretty much the same way. We women need to stop beating each other to a bloody pulp and stick together, yet I don't think that means we should just toe the line.

... But I'm done with the big mouths and their causes.

Perhaps I'm also just done with the numbers. I'm done with the idea that feminists are disappointed in me. Done with people telling me what I, as a FILL IN THE BLANK, should do.

I'm done with the talking heads who pose as independent journalists sneaking in their agendas. Hell ... I'm kinda over agendas. I'm over insecurites. I'm over political correctness. I'm over the whole "you are right but you should have done it this way" arm-chair quarterbacking.

I know that lots of us just don't get along, but I'm really beginning to think that moving forward really isn't feasible because NO ONE CARES ABOUT MOVING FORWARD, we only care about moving in a direction that we've picked. We just call it forward. And that, to be quite blunt, sucks.

I suppose therein lies the lesson. My way or the highway is over.

I want to move on.

And I am moving on.

I am moving on.

I'm moving forward.

I'm moving backward.

I don't even care if I bump into to things along the way.

See, we bought some pre-owned cars over the weekend. But my conscience is in the clear. These babies are compact and cost a fraction of their original sticker price. Best of all they use no fossil (or even biofuels) to operate.

They are Plasma Cars ... and they rock the house.

And you know, I don't care if I'm just going to the other side of the house, I'm going to drive from now on. Forget walking.


Jasi said...

Plasma cars.. In my day they were low to the ground and called roller racers. lol

Everyone's so full of **it. Aren't they? The solution isn't stealing from one to benefit another- whether respect, rights, money (taxes). It's all about trying each day to be a little bit less of an ass, cleaning up after ourselves, and not giving our money to people we don't like (support). So easy if we all try to be a little more human each day.

apathy lounge said...

Love this post...and I now covet your Plasma cars.

Andrea said...

You sound so frustrated, and you know what? I am too. I feel helpless and while I also feel pretty well informed about things our society is dealing with, I feel powerless to enact any kind of change to the health of our economy, our people, and our marketplaces and, in general, our country.

You've articulated pretty well, even if intentionally vague, the stagnation I've been milling around with lately. I think it's why all my posts have been frou frou or nonexistent. Maybe I'll just have to do a randomy post myself, just to clear my airways and get the air flow moving again.

P.S. How's the new camera working out?

toyfoto said...

The camera is working out pretty well, and it was an amazing thing at first. but now that i've been using it I realized that the flawlessness of some of the photos bugs me. Like there's already a noise filter built in that makes the faces seems smooth and perfect ...

I miss film. Better digital doesn't get me closer to film.

Andrea said...

Yes, flawlessness can be a flaw in itself. Sometimes the flaws are where the beauty lies. I think I'd be annoyed too, if the option to shoot the flaws was taken from me. Or reduced.