It's not because we're cheap, it's because we care (what other people think)

Every time Ittybit is invited to a birthday party, when it comes to finding an appropriate present, I turn into a strange and sad version of the entity known as Competimommy.

The gift -- especially when you don't know a person and are trying to make friends -- becomes all important.

It can't be too loud, or take up too much room. It can't cost too many dollars or too few cents. It has to conform to a parenting style you may or may not espouse -- Attachment, Free Range, Conservative, Liberal, Waldorf, Licensed Character Friendly, Plastic Aversion, Barbie Is Killing Feminism -- lest the item wind up in the trash.

Silly, I know. It's just another thing that will inevitably take up space on yard sale table or gather dust under a bed.

Since the crafting virus has recently settled in, I've been thinking of ways to spread the germs. Birthday Parties seem perfect.

Handmade, after all, is kind of the new black; upcycling, the new salvage.

So, fresh off the success of felt crowns, and feeling a little smug about the boy’s Monster Pilla, for the most recent party we attended we made a …

HEY! MONSTER, WAKE UP! PILLOW



WHAT YOU'LL NEED:

* A man's extra large sweater (I used something I found in the closet that resembled terry cloth but softer)
* Something small made of polar fleece that has pockets I used a child's-sized vest.
*Buttons
* Threads of matching color
* Embroidery floss
* Fabric scissors
* Fiberfil stuffing (Yes, I did gut a thrifted pillow)
* About 20 minutes with a sewing machine (or an hour with a needle and a beer)

WHAT YOU DON'T REALLY NEED (unless you are worried you will drive a nail in the coffin of the economy {causing terrorists to win} if you don't keep buying stuff) BUT MIGHT BE NICE.

*A small (tiny) travel alarm clock


WHAT YOU DO:

* Launder garments if they've been laying on the floor of your husband's side of the bed or the bottom of the kids' closets. For any length of time. Ever.



* Cut the backside of the men's sweater into a large rectangle.

* Cut the pocket (top side only) off the fleece.

* Fold the pillow material in half and eyeball where the middle is.

* Place the pocket in the spot where the middle seems to be and pin it to the pillow material.

* Unfold the pillow fabric and topstitch the pocket around three sides. Leave the top open (unless your monster happens to eats laterally or sub-mandibly (that's not a word).

* Sew on the eyes with embroidery floss. (You could alternatively use felt circles and blanket-stitch them to the pillow fabric).



* Refold pillow material (wrong-side out) and sew around three sides, leaving the last side open enough to jam in the stuffing.

* Turn right side out and stuff it (I've always wanted to say that).

* Turn open edges inward and whipstitch pillow closed.

* Wrap clock, slip into pocket. All you need to do after that is make a card and you're good to go.